Quote of the Month
Without mysteries, life would be very dull indeed. What would be left to strive for if everything were known?
~Charles de Lint
Most every coaching session unveils a powerful client insight and progress towards a worthy goal. It’s a privilege to witness my clients’ tenacity, vulnerability, and resilience. While every client and coaching session is unique, there are some nuggets of wisdom that emerge time and time again. I’m offering two of them here to remind you of what’s possible for yourself – whether you’re noodling a career change, becoming more assertive in your current job, or investing in a new adventure.
Don’t Say No to Yourself
A client was feeling a bit resentful of the additional responsibilities she had taken on without a pay increase. I asked if she knew the pay range for her position, and where she fell in the range given her new responsibilities. She didn’t know and didn’t want to bother her boss. Through our coaching, she worked up the courage to ask her manager for a compensation evaluation, and presented concrete information about her accomplishments and value to the organization.
Four weeks later she received a 12% raise!
In the pursuit of equity and fairness, don’t say no to yourself. Your voice is your greatest asset to advocate for yourself.
You Can’t Figure It Out, You Can Live It Out
If I had a dollar for every client who said they just want to “figure it out” I’d be upgrading to first class on my next flight! Unfortunately, life doesn’t come with an instruction manual. We can’t figure out our next career step or how to make more friends just by thinking about it. We have to live it out by creating and testing a few valid hypotheses. Come up with valid hypotheses, and go out and test them. Create mini experiments. Reflect on what you learn. Create the next experiment. Rinse and repeat. A recent client was considering staying in consulting or becoming a vet tech. Only after she went out and talked to 3 vet techs, then shadowed two of them did she decide to take the plunge.
When trying to figure your next something out:
Note some hypotheses – best guesses for next steps.
Conduct mini-experiments.
Reflect on your learnings to determine your next experiment.
A Final Thought
Life is a compelling mystery novel; we can’t predict its unfolding, no matter how much we want to. You are the protagonist of your own journey, with a choice to embrace awe or fear. As a former therapist once told me, “At the edge of the unknown, take your curiosity with you.”
I hope you choose curiosity.
Coaching For A Cause
If these takeaways from my coaching sessions interests you, I’m offering 1 hour of free coaching in exchange for a $60 donation to the You Matter Marathon, or a charity of your choosing. Check it out!
Until next time, take care of yourself.
