Here’s what two whiskered teachers are showing me about reclaiming joy – and how you can do the same.
As you know, I said goodbye to my beloved dog Gracie in April. Grief settled in like a fog. For a while, joy wasn’t even on the horizon.
And truth be told – even in the best of times, joy doesn’t always come easily for me. As many women, I grew up being a pleaser and being rewarded for meeting the needs of others. There wasn’t much room for joy and play.
I’ve had to be deliberate about seeking out joy – one reason having animals in my life has been so rewarding.
In May, a friend introduced me to kittens she was fostering and though they were adorable, I quickly realized it was too soon.
One month later, instead of doomscrolling, I casually went to PetFinder…just to look. I knew I wasn’t ready for a dog – but I’d had cats before, so viewing kittens felt harmless…until 2 grey and white kitties stopped me mid-scroll.
My tender heart started to beat faster. Was there truly love left in it to give? Was it too soon?
Since I lived out of state, I doubted I’d be chosen as an adopter and decided there was no harm in filling out an application.
As you may have guessed, after an appropriately rigorous vetting process I was approved.
So, with a joyful heart, I introduce you to Maggie and Max!
And here’s what they’re teaching me:
Don’t Postpone Joy!
As the spectacular poet, Mary Oliver says in her poem “Don’t Hesitate“: Joy is not meant to be a crumb. Kittens remind me that play is the main course. The sillier the better.
Even in our professional lives, when we postpone joy, we show up less authentically, make decisions from depletion rather than abundance, and often miss opportunities for connection and creativity.
And if you’re questioning the appropriateness of joy during times when so many people are struggling – I get it. I used to wonder that too. But now I see joy as an important and even radical part of my resilience strategy. We can’t help others if we aren’t feeling strong ourselves.
What This Might Mean for You
What’s currently keeping you from prioritizing joy?
What would change in your life if you treated joy as essential, not optional?
You don’t need to get kittens or puppies to experience joy! (But it’s certainly not a bad idea!)
You can start by making a list of 50 Dependable Joys – things in your life that bring you contentment, aliveness or a spark of pleasure.
Simple things like:
- The first sip of coffee in the morning
- Putting the final piece in a jig-saw puzzle
- Walking with a friend
- Coaching a team member
- Volunteering
- The smell of fallen leaves
- Singing in the car.
My guess is that, like many of my clients, you’ll be surprised by how many of the items are free and easily accessible.
Your turn: Make your own list of dependable joys and then put it somewhere you can see it. Challenge yourself to do at least 2 things from the list each week.
You matter. Your joy matters. And the world needs more of what you bring when you’re operating from a place of genuine joy rather than obligation.
I’d love to hear from you: What’s one dependable joy you could prioritize this week? Share it in the comments below – let’s inspire each other to choose joy.
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